tangled


I’m a procrastinator. If that’s even a word.

In school I used to get homework, go home, leave it on my desk and then my phone would ring and I’d get deep into conversations about… I don’t even remember. But it just seemed so important back then and there was my homework, lying cold next to the computer. Then after a while I’d turn the computer on to check vital stuff. Like… msn. The homework was a nice place to roll the mouse over…

Then I’d sit up all night before deadline, cramming it like never (many times) before. I’d beat myself up for not doing things right away. Just a little bit. But it worked pretty well for me. I got pretty nice grades from both elementary and high school.

So I guess I didn’t really learn my lesson…

Last year, something I had, was lost. Someone I cared about lost touch. Something unknown became missed. Something I knew became unfamiliar. Someone I loved passed away.

And every which one of these times, I stayed true to habit. I brought it home with me, I put it aside and then allowed myself to be swayed by the various distractions in everyday life. But this time there’s no deadline. No cramming.

Still, somehow, the school of life is closer than real life school ever was to teaching me a lesson. And just for the record, in case you didn’t know, procrastinator IS a word.

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